Look Up Beloved.

"Do not remember the former things, Nor consider the things of old.

Behold, I will do a new thing, 

Now it shall spring forth;

Shall you not know it?

I will even make a road in the wilderness 

And rivers in the dessert."

Isaiah 43:18-19

How often do we focus on the old? 

Sometimes I get so caught up in past memories, hurts, opportunities that I don't see the wide open door right in front of me.

The Lord tells us to lay down our burdens and let Him carry them.

That means the shame, depression, unworthiness, hurt, etc.

We cannot forget the "what ifs."

What if I had...

What if I didn't...

What if I listened.. 

The list of "what ifs" could go for miles.

But we are not called to look down, or backwards.

The Lord calls us to look up and forward.

The Lord is new EVERYDAY.

When we lose a day, then another day, and another  because we can't seem to look up, we lose a new thing. 

The Lord is doing a new thing always and He has all of these beautiful promises but we are holding ourselves captive in our own chains.

Look up beloved. 

Look forward beloved.

There is a new thing waiting for you to see it.

This wilderness you are walking through has a road built, but you are walking away from it.

The dessert you are in has rivers flowing all around you.

Look beloved, see the goodness of God flow around you.

See the goodness of the Lord making a new thing for you.

Let the chains fall from you.

"I choose you daughter."

It has been quite a while since I have written.

I could say I have been crazy busy and have a hundred blog posts stored up, but that'd be lying.

Honestly, the Lord has been dealing with my heart and here it is.

I had a dream that I was at a gym and there was a huge crowd of people.

I was on a basketball team with a friend of mine and we were having a good time.

Half time rolled around and the sport changed from basketball to volleyball.

All of a sudden I was sitting on the stands alone.

My team called a few other friends to play and left me on the sidelines.

As I was sitting there feeling like dirt, cast away, rejected, a father figure came.

There wasn't anything significant that he said, he was just there.

This past 2 weeks the Lord has been speaking to me about who I am.

I have been the person who gets chosen, invited, called, texted, etc.

I also have been the person who has not been chosen, invited, called, texted, etc.

It is really hard to face the fact that you might not be picked and that
people move forward without you sometimes.

I have dealt with this a lot lately.

I was praying and praying asking the Lord to help me out.

He said, "I choose you daughter."

There is a throne in each and every one of our hearts.

What we place on that throne is a defining point in our lives.

You may be thinking you are great and that this doesn't apply to you but unless Jesus is on that throne you are not great.

You feel great now, but there will be a day when whatever is on that throne fails you.

Whether it is sooner or later, it will happen.

I never realized that I had this box of values on the throne in my heart.

Yes, I love the Lord and I continue to seek Him, but I had those values stored on the throne
in my heart.

The box was sitting on the edge just waiting to come crashing down.

I had this perfect picture in my head and I received all these different values that other people have of me. Those values started to be my affirmation.

I placed people on the throne that belongs to the Lord and they fell.

They fell because of ME. 

I put them on a pedestal and as soon as I got hurt they crashed down.

Hurt, broken and bruised I cried out to the Lord. 

He came to my rescue, "I choose you daughter."

You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, 

And called from its farthest regions, 

And said to you,

"You are My servant, I have chosen you and have not cast you away."

Isaiah 41:9

The Lord chooses us every time.

The Father chooses us every time.

It doesn't matter what we place on the throne in our hearts, when it comes crashing down He is there.

As I continued to seek the Lords heart for me, 

He continued to affirm me.

The only difference was that He affirmed me in HIM, not other people. 

Our hearts are so precious to the Lord and He just wants us to be loved by Him.

When we place people, things, church, work, etc. on the throne in our hearts we get hurt.

The Lord is sitting there beckoning us to come to Him.

He can see the hurt we are causing ourselves and the Lord just wants to pick us up and hold us.

He wants to show us all He created us to be.

It is so easy to take our hurt and blame it on whoever hurt us but there is so much more to it than that.

During my process of healing I have learned a couple things.

When I feel hurt it either means:

1.) I placed someone or something on the throne in my heart that didn't belong 

 or

2.) The person who hurt me placed something on their throne that didn't belong.

"Hurting people hurt people."

I am convinced that the hurt we feel is a matter of where our eyes are.

If we look to the Lord when we get hurt and cry out to Him then He will come and pick us up and reveal to us where our eyes were misplaced, or show us how precious the person who hurt us is.

He will give us new eyes to see the way He does.

He will show us what we made idols, that we allowed ourselves to be idols, or that someone else had an idol.

I can't tell you how many times I have felt replaced, cast away and left alone.

My dream I wrote earlier is just another confirmation of the Lord's faithfulness.

It's a reminder that when we feel replaced, cast away and left alone, He is there.

The Lord chose you , He chooses you every time. 

You are irreplaceable.

Jesus took your broken, sinful heart and died with it.

You are now redeemed and seated in heavenly places.

The Lord has your heart.

Let Him reveal Himself to you.

Not just a story

Knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things,

like silver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers,

but with the precious blood of Christ, 

as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.

1 Peter 1:18-19

I cannot count how many times I have heard, read, or taught the story of Christ's death and resurrection.

"God sent His one and only son to die for us.." blah blah blah.

It's almost become like a Dr. Suess book; we all know the story.

But, it's NOT just a story-- it's real life.

Death is real.

Life is real.

Redemption is real.

This morning I was reading 1 Peter and doing a study by Max Lucado and I felt a smack in the head.

I love the story of redemption and everything that it means. It's beautiful.

Today when I got smacked I felt the Lord say "Sarah, it's NOT a story."

The death and resurrection isn't a story, it's real life.

Not only that but it's who we are.

When Christ went to that cross He didn't just die and raise up to defeat death.

No-- Christ became ME.

He became my shameful sinful heart and took the penalty 

He became ME and took the wrath for ME.

He took my heart to the grave, dripping in blood and then He raised a new heart up.

He raised up my heart completely redeemed and placed it next to the right hand of His Father with Him.

But God, who is rich in mercy, 

because of His great love with which He loved us,

even when we were dead in trespasses,

made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), 

and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 2:4-6

Jesus died as us and our Father raised our hearts up in Jesus to be seated in heavenly places.

It's not just a story, it's real redemption displayed in a perfect Lord.

Leap of Faith.

And a voice spoke to him again the second time, 

"What God has cleansed you must not call common."

Acts 10:15

Then he said to them, 

"You know how unlawful it is for a Jewish man to keep company with or go to one of another nation.

But God has shown me that I should not call any man common or unclean"

Acts 10:28

This morning I am in awe of how the Lord continues to display His faithfulness.

In this chapter the Lord takes Cornelius, a centurion of what was called the Italian Regiment and calls him to take a leap and seek out Simon Peter, a man who comes from a Jewish background.

Simon Peter sees that it is the will of the Father and goes.

The Lord takes these two men with completely different backgrounds to meet, despite how unlawful it is.

The Lord calls them to risk their reputation with the consequence of persecution.

With that leap of faith the Lord proves His faithfulness.

The Lord redeems a law that will forever be recognized.

He takes two people, common and uncommon and redeems the relationships.

I love that.

The Lord spoke truth into Cornelius and Simon Peter, then went on to display it through them.

"No man is common or unclean."

We have been redeemed by the Lord.

NO man is an exception.

To this day the Lord continues to display this leap of faith and its reward:

our redemption. We are all cleansed by the blood of our Lord.

Take a leap of faith and let redemption be displayed.

Believe.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed,

That I would see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living.

Psalm 27:13

This verse is so dear to my heart. 

It pulls strings I forget I have until I read it.

When I lost my brother the question that I am sure everyone asks bubbled up, "Why?"

When tragedy strikes we either dive head first toward the Lord or we dive into anger.

Which way we dive begins with our "Why?"

What we believe is where our direction comes from.

David went through so much.

He suffered, but he always believed in the goodness of the Lord.

Why--Because he knew God's heart.

He believed in God's goodness and believed he would see it.

When I lost Jeff everything felt numb.

I chose to dive head first toward the Lord but it still hurt.

When I think back to the time of the healing process, I see a movie screen of how life was in my eyes.

Days felt long and nights felt short.

Hundreds of people around and yet still I felt alone.

I remember walking down the hallways at school and feeling eyes stare at me.

I felt like life was on fast forward and I was on rewind.

People move on, life moves forward and I was stuck in the middle of grief.

Honestly, I would have to say that the easiest part of grief is the beginning.

In the beginning people want to help and love on you.

You have support, encouragement and feel like you can make it.

But when life starts to move forward and you start to lose that, the hardest part comes.

It's where people are not believing in the goodness of the Lord for you

 and YOU have to choose to believe in the goodness.

But when you choose to believe in the goodness you have hope.

Something deep in your heart starts to stir and the Lord overflows your cup.

Peace, Hope, and Love fall into the emptiness in your heart.

Whether it's death, money issues, broken relationships, or depression, God is still good.

Don't lose heart, seek the Lord's heart, and BELIEVE in His goodness.

Let Him overflow your cup.

"Seek My face"

When You said, "Seek My face,"

My heart said to You, "Your face, Lord, I will seek."

Psalm 27:8

Where are you seeking God?

In a preacher?

Teacher?

Maybe a worship leader?

Church?

The Lord doesn't say, "Seek My children's faces."

The Lord doesn't even say, "Seek my church's face."

No, He clearly says, "Seek MY face."

The last few days I have been thinking about this.

Why does He specify seeking HIS face?

I came to the realization that He knew we would try to seek Him through other faces.

It's a reminder to seek His face alone.

He doesn't want us to look at church and that be our face of who He is.

People are not consistent, He is.

Worship songs are not consistent, He is.

Sermons are not consistent, He is.

If we are looking to the church to sustain our relationship with the Lord, we are always going to be unfulfilled. 

Church is not there to sustain our relationship with the Lord.

Church is connecting the body to the Lord as one.

Our job as individuals is to seek His face.

As soon as we get distracted from seeking His face we fall.

We become offended that the pastor didn't speak a message that touched your life for the last two weeks.

We get annoyed that the worship leader's voice didn't sound right on every song.

We just don't like the music ever since so-and-so left.

As soon as we rely on other faces to sustain our relationship with God our view of Him is skewed.

We will always leave unsatisfied, annoyed, and think the church isn't right with God.

In reality we are the church. If we're not fulfilled, it means we aren't right with God.

Our eyes are not on His face.

He says, "SEEK MY FACE."

Seek the Lord's face.

When church isn't satisfying your heart you have been looking at the wrong face.

Church is a body, God is the head.

Seek His face. 

Be Moved.

And when Jesus went out He saw a great multitude;

and He was moved with compassion for them, 

and healed their sick.

Matthew 14:14

Jesus was MOVED WITH COMPASSION.

Moved with compassion.

I was reading through Matthew this morning just skimming through parables and the feeding of the 5,000 caught my eye.

How incredible to imagine the scene where Jesus was moved with compassion.

As I was dwelling on this passage I started to just watch Jesus move.

I saw Him look out at these people, and feel their desperate hearts longing for Him.

He felt their pain, grief, captivity, and the lost confused hearts.

All of them were there for hope, hope only He could bring.

He was moved.

When I think of Jesus being moved I see this beautiful dance.

Every movement full of grace and perfect love.

I have always admired dancers; every move they make is graceful, and connects together to tell a story or display an emotion.

Jesus was displaying His heart moved with compassion.

He was dancing through the crowd in perfect timing, releasing freedom in their lives.

WOW.

What a beautiful Lord.

But He doesn't stop at that, He continues to be moved and feeds all of them.

He dances through the multitude breaking chains and then feeds them.

He fills their bellies and hearts.

He dwells with them in fellowship.

I love that the Lord never leaves a great multitude hungry.

He knows every need and never fails to fill it. 

How amazing is our Lord. 

Let compassion move you in a beautiful dance with the Lord.