Religion vs. Relationship?

"I am not religious, I have a relationship with God."

I don't know about you but I have said this over and over.

I have told people this very thing many times.

This is true right? 

Religion is everywhere.

Mormonism, Hinduism, Sikh, etc..

The list could go on. 

A while ago I did a Bible study by Beth Moore on James and I learned something.

Pure undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.

James 1:27

Pure undefiled religion isn't bad.

Yes, you heard me right.

Pure undefiled religion isn't bad.

I was completely thrown off when I heard that religion isn't bad.

Something I have said for years was a saying based off of a skewed view of pure undefiled religion.

When I look at other religions I see a lot of what other people see in me.

As a Christian I see that they witness, obey the law, treat people with kindness, spend time reading their  equivalent to the Bible, and pray.

I do all of these things too.

That's religion.

Religion serves a purpose. 

It is an action out of devotion.

1 Corinthians 12 talks about spiritual gifts and moves into chapter 13 to talk about how without love these are useless.

Religion is the same way.

We can be good, obey the laws, treat people kindly, read our Bible and pray but without love these do nothing.

That is what separates religion from pure undefiled religion.

It is so easy to get distracted and think that we have to tell people they are wrong in what they believe.

That religion is evil and condemns them.

James called us to be religious though.

He speaks about how important it is. 

But love is the key.

The Lord loves for us to be kind, read His word, pray, obey His commandments and share His heart with people.

He desires it out of love.

But above all these things put on love, 

which is the bond of perfection.

Colossians 3:14

When you take religion and the heart of the Father,

love is what bonds them together in perfection.

The Father is love. 

Love perfects religion.

It brings religion back to its pure undefiled purpose.

When I love something I want to express it somehow.

Worship, prayer, obedience, etc.

Pure undefiled religion is a display of love for our Father.

I have a relationship with my God that brings love into religion.

Walking in Freedom is Walking in Forgiveness

Walking in Freedom is Walking in Forgiveness.

I don't know whether you knew this or not but people aren't perfect.

I'm not perfect, you aren't perfect, even my wonderful husband is not perfect.

I've had a rude awakening of the reality of this concept.

For some people it's easy to find their flaws and others not so much.

When we see the people with "no flaws" we put them on an emotional pedestal.

They do no wrong, they will never hurt you, and they are better than every one else.

But, then something happens, the person that we put on the pedestal messes up.

They hurt us and we crucify them.

We get hurt and take matters into our own hands.

They will never be allowed close to us again and we change our list and put them at the bottom.

I have been there.

I have done all of this.

I hated every moment of it.

We build this wall up inside of us and swear we will never let anyone close to us again.

Our hearts become hard and unsatisfied.

We feel a distance from God and wonder why we can't connect.

So, when all of these emotions come there is only one logical option.

RUN.

When my brother Jeff died I felt numb.

It was a Sunday morning and I went to shower after I was told.

I stood in the shower for what felt like forever.

I felt something inside of me say "If you don't go to church today, you will never go back."

I knew with all my heart right there I had a choice.

A choice to walk in freedom or bondage.

I knew that my heart would never soften if I let it get hard right at that moment.

I got ready went to church and did the only thing I could.

I prayed the same thing over and over again.

"I'm not mad God. I'm not mad God. I'm not mad God."

I didn't know anything else to say. 

I felt nothing for a long time.

Months. 

Eventually, I started to feel what I prayed. 

Freedom.

Enter by the narrow gate;

for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction,

and there are many who go by it.

Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.

Matthew 7:13-14

Forgiveness is the narrow gate and difficult way but it leads to freedom, life.

When we get hurt by people, whether it is their fault, ours, or a misunderstanding, it doesn't matter.

We have to learn about ourselves.

Our job isn't to change how others act. 

Our job is to figure out where we are at with our Father.

Where is your value?

It could be that we took too much value from that person's opinion and allowed it to define who we are.

That pedestal is a dangerous place to place someone other than God.

There is always a lesson for our own hearts when we get hurt.

That lesson isn't to harden your heart.

We have to learn to press into the Lord,

To crush the bridge of their values of you in our heart.

We have to learn to walk in forgiveness, 

to walk in freedom.

Forgiveness leads to freedom.

You might not feel anything but hurt for months, but sooner or later you will see how

choosing the narrow gate is hard but it leads to life.  

You will find yourself closer to God, finding more and more about His heart for you.

Learn to walk in forgiveness.  It is walking in freedom.

Don't be Timid

A while ago I had someone pray for me and he said something that stuck out to me:

"Don't be timid."

I hadn't thought of it in a while but the Lord brought it up yesterday and again today.

"Don't be timid."

It is so easy for me to be timid.

I continually think, "I am not old enough to say something."

Another famous one I've said over and over, "I'm just a kid."

I started reading Jeremiah this morning and I realized that we are like Jeremiah in so many ways.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you;

Before you were born I sanctified you;

I ordained you as a prophet to the nations."

Then said I:

"Ah, Lord God!

Behold, I cannot speak for I am a youth."

"Do not say, 'I am a youth,'

For you shall go to all to whom I send you,

And whatever I command you, 

you shall speak. 

Do not be afraid of their faces,

For I am with you to deliver you," says the Lord.

Jeremiah 1:5-8 

Jeremiah was probably between 13-17 when the Lord told him this.

Jeremiah had a calling on his life. 
Being timid wasn't a part of that.
Jeremiah was told not to be afraid.

In other words he was called to not be timid.

The Lord God was his deliverer.

He still is.

How often do we refuse to listen to what God says quietly because of our timidness?

How often do we mistake Gods voice for our timidness?

I don't know about you but I know I have been there, done that, and bought the t-shirt.

This is something the Lord has been teaching me since I went to Africa in February.

God didn't create us to be timid.

The Lord has had a call on our lives since before we were born. 

While I was in Africa I heard the words "NO REGRETS."
The phrase took a whole new meaning for my life in Africa.

We often associate "NO REGRETS" with "YOLO" (You Only Live Once), typically meaning, party hard.

But, God said something different to me.

He said "Sarah, I want you to have NO REGRETS."

I realized that God wanted me to recognize who He is everyday.

He is the same everyday.

He gives us opportunities to love constantly.
We choose to be timid.
I wait to listen until my heart is beating out of control and His voice is so overpowering that I can't do anything else.
When I was in Africa I decided that I needed to listen to God constantly.

I  started to pray first and think later.
I started to love first and think later.
I started to see how God is ready all the time.
He doesn't always give us flashing lights and big signs.
It is a still small whisper at times and sometimes we have to really press in.
So I did.

When I came back my heart was changed. 
I went on with my life and it was busy.
I had a lot of adjustments to make (marriage), a reception to plan, and of course a job.
In the midst of all this there are tons of hurting people around me.
It broke my heart.
That's when I felt God saying, "NO REGRETS" again. 

I remember thinking, "God, this isn't Africa." 

He said, "I know, Sarah, that wasn't just for Africa."

Refusing to timid is for everywhere. 

God didn't call us to be timid.

He called us to be "A fortified city and an iron pillar,

And bronze walls against the whole land,"

That's what God told Jeremiah.

"For behold, I have made you this day

A fortified city and an Iron pillar,

And bronze walls against the whole land-

Against the kings of Judah,

Against its princes,

Against its priests,

And against the people of the land.

They will fight against you,

But they shall not prevail against you.

For I am with you," says the Lord, "to deliver you."

Jeremiah 1:18-19

He made me to be an iron pillar and the bronze walls against the fight.
I am a pillar of love.
I am a wall of protection.
I am a city of healing and restoration. 
That is who God made me. 
He made me to continually be in communion with Him.

He made me a safe place for hurting people to find Him.
I found myself changing my entire mindset.
I was looking for what the Lord saw,
 listening to what the Lord spoke,
 and 
doing what the Lord did.
Why?
Because that is what we are called to do.
The Lord will deliver us from fear.
He will deliver us from rejection.
He will deliver us from timidness.

He wants us to speak into His people.

He wants us to love His people on a new level.

He wants us to reach them on His level.
Our level is timid and prevents us from loving deeper because we fear rejection.

The Lord is with me.

The Lord is with you.

He is always faithful.
He NEVER fails.

Don't be timid.

We are called to love with no regrets.

Love Edifies

I was watching a sermon/teaching yesterday on fasting for intimacy and the speaker said something that really caught my attention.

"Knowledge has a way of destroying relationships."

I haven't stopped thinking about it since. 

This morning as I was asking the Lord what to write the only thing I heard was this quote.

I couldn't think of what to end it with.

I kept asking God for what He wanted and complaining that I had no clue where to go with this quote [because I didn't like what He picked.]

I mean, honestly it could be so wrong. 

Solomon desired knowledge/wisdom.

If you look up knowledge in the Bible most of the scriptures tell you to seek knowledge.

I said "God I have all these against me, and it's your word.

I have to be wrong so what do you want me to write."

Again I hear the same quote. 

So, I kept searching for what He wanted to tie it together with.

Now concerning things offered to idols. 

We all have knowledge. 

Knowledge puffs up, but love edifies.

And if anyone thinks that he knows anything, he knows nothing yet as he ought to know.

But if anyone loves God, this one is known by Him.

1 Corinthians 8:1-3

I found this verse and kept studying over it.

I searched through my Bible to see what it connected to.

I found lots of cross references. 

One was 1 Corinthians 13, "The Love Chapter."

So, How does knowledge ruin relationships?

I was brought way back to Genesis. 

Adam and Eve.

The ONE thing they couldn't have in this glorious garden was what?

The tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

This tree of knowledge wrecked their relationship with God.

 I don't think that this tree only represents knowledge of good and evil.

I believe it represents God's relationship with Adam and Eve.

Eve just had to KNOW what it was, what happened when she ate it, what it meant.

I believe God placed that tree there to give Adam and Eve a choice.

LOVE or KNOWLEDGE.

They chose knowledge and it ruined that relationship based off of love.

1 Corinthians 8:1-3 mentions that knowledge puffs up.

knowledge becomes proud. 

We start to base our lives off of what we know or don't know.

That is NOT how God designed us.

If God wanted us to base our lives off of what our knowledge is then He wouldn't have forbidden the tree of KNOWLEDGE.

His heart desires us to choose love; to choose Him.

He knows that knowledge alone ruins relationships.

And though I have the gift of prophecy,

and understand all mysteries and all knowledge,

and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains,

but have not love, it profits me nothing.

1 Corinthians 13:2-3

Knowledge without love does nothing.

The devil has knowledge.

The devil knows scripture.

The devil is smart.

He has NO love.

Therefore, there is no profit for him.

He can throw knowledge in Gods face all day long but

Love conquers all.

In the end it doesn't matter who knows what, the devil was defeated through love.

Now, I am not saying that God isn't as smart as the devil.

Obviously He is, He is love.

That is true knowledge and wisdom.

We let knowledge get in the way of so many relationships.

So many insecurities are based off of knowledge.

I am guilty of it.

I cannot tell you how many times in a day I get frustrated and insecure because I don't "KNOW."

"I dont know the rules for softball."

"I don't know how to work this program"

"I don't know what I like."

I could go on and on, but it doesn't matter.

LOVE MATTERS.

I know God.

I know Love.

In the end Love is faithful.

Love edifies.

Be Vulnerable

Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another;

love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous;

Not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling,

but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this,

that you may inherit a blessing.

1 Peter 3:8 (NKJV)

We are called to love.

We are called to be compassionate.

We are called to be tenderhearted.

We are called to bless.

We are called to have one mind.

When I read this I see us in our calling.

I see hearts open and genuine.

I see love pouring out everywhere.

No fear.

This calling is hard.

It's scary.

Having compassion on someone means that we have to feel their heart.

Being tenderhearted means we have to be soft and open. 

Blessing people means that even when we are betrayed we are still called to bless.

Loving means that we put our own selfishness aside for others.

We are called to be vulnerable.

We all want to share our hearts, but that involves being vulnerable.

That means that we have to step out of our box that claims we are doing great and tell someone we aren't doing good.

But fear grips us. 

By being vulnerable we have the risk of getting hurt.

We think "They won't understand."

Or

"They will think I am stupid and weak." 

We are afraid because we fear rejection.

So, we hide it.

We are not made to hide our hearts.

Guard them yes, not hide them.

Above all else,

guard your heart,

for everything you do flows from it.

Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Guarding your heart doesn't mean making it hard to the people around you.

It's guarding it from the evil one.

It's checking your heart for it's motives.

It's making sure your heart is flowing from God not your own hurt, or the devil's offense.

We are made for each other.

When God made Adam He made Eve for him. 

He made it so His children needed each other.

Above all we need Him and He leads us to each other.

We become one mind, bringing glory to Our Father.

 We all have strengths and weaknesses.

Our Father created us to be one mind.

He knows that where I am weak another is strong.

Our hurts, our trials, our just plain awful days are hard by ourselves.

If we come together as a body of Christ and raise each other up then we are in a whole different ballgame. 

Those days get less hard, our hurts start to heal, and our trials become triumphs.

Being vulnerable isn't being weak.

It's defeating fear with love.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear,

because fear involves torment. 

But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.

1 John 4:18 (NKJV)

Being vulnerable is loving.

Love defeats the enemy.

The fear he tries to deceive us with has NO power over love.

 Take over fear and love.

Be vulnerable.

It's okay to be wrong

So this morning I wrote out my entire blog, posted it,

 and then let Kadin review it.

He told me that it didn't sound like me.

I got hurt, fear gripped my heart and I became self conscious.

I ran out of the bathroom in a towel and deleted it as quick as I could.

I began praying and asking The Lord what was wrong. 

Why didn't it sound like me?

I was writing what I heard.

He said, "It's okay to be wrong daughter."

But Lord, I could have damaged someone's heart.

"It's okay to be wrong daughter."

God, I don't understand.

"Daughter, it is okay to be wrong."

  

Sometimes we hear The Lord speak and we assume that it's for everyone.

Sometimes we hear The Lord speak and add our views of people in our lives and forget that The Lord's view is so much greater than that.

It's okay to be wrong.
There is a feeling that comes when you recognize you are wrong.
It almost feels like a pinch in your heart.
It's pride being pushed around.
No one likes that.
But we have a choice.
Either we can take our pride lift it up and try to justify ourselves, hurting people whose intentions were pure.
OR
We can sit back and just let The Lord flow.
Let Him speak and show you what was wrong, and let Him lead you differently.
Let Him teach you.

My first instinct was to be bitter toward Kadin.
I am extreme, I either want all in or all out.
The in between is really hard for me.
My reaction was to jump and delete that blog, shoot, you know I was going to delete the whole thing.
I was irritated that Kadin pointed out my flaw, it hurt my pride and instead of wanting to deal with it I decided to just go extreme.
I couldn't really get the thought in my head that the WHOLE thing isn't wrong just a small portion is.
For someone who is either HOT or COLD that's a hard concept to grasp.
I started to go extreme but there was a tug in my heart to know God's heart.
I deleted my blog post and decided if I am going to go extreme I may as well go extreme toward my Father.
Just a few simple words changed my whole look on my post.
"Daughter, It's okay to be wrong."
I realized God used my mistake and made it good.
It's what my dad always called "a teachable moment"

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,
who have been called according to His purpose
Romans 8:28

The Lord is SO good.
I love Him.
My intentions were never to be wrong, or to hurt anyone.
That's when pride is the hardest.
I had such great intentions but, the view of God in my heart changed slightly.
But, guess what, HE LOVES ME.
He works all things for the good of those who love Him.
All I had to do was step back and say, "Lord, what is wrong?"
He just wanted my pride.
I just had to give it to Him.

We can't mess up God's plan.
We can't go beyond redemption.
We can't do anything to make God change His mind about us.
Whether it's a simple wrong like messing up a blog post or murder.
God has a plan for us.
He loves us.
He will work ALL things for the good of those who love Him.
We just have to let Him take our wrongs and let Him teach us.

Show me Your ways, O Lord;
Lead me in Your truth and teach me,
For You are the God of my salvation;
On You I wait all the day.
Psalm 25:4-5


It is okay to be wrong.

JESUS IS THE LAW

And suddenly, a woman who had a flow of blood for twelve years came from behind

 and touched the hem of His garment. For she said to herself, "If only I may touch His garment, I shall be made well." But Jesus turned around, and when He saw her He said, "Be of good cheer daughter; your faith has made you well." And the woman was made well from that hour.

Matthew 9:20-22

Let me paint you a picture of what I see when I read this.

I see this woman painted with shame, rejection, condemnation, fear, pain, and sickness. 

She is covered with it.

BUT, there is this Hope she sees and is desperate for. 

So desperate and broken that she is crawling BEHIND Jesus.

She sees the hem of His garment, not anything else.

The dirtiest part of all His clothing, and she sees Hope.

This woman sees Hope in this dirty, dragging, nasty hem.

That is all she sees-- HOPE.  

She is clinging to it, crawling just to brush it to be healed.

Then, she does. 

BUT JESUS TURNED AROUND. 

Suddenly, the law becomes reality again. 

Fear is gripping her. 

Shame and condemnation become a rope around her neck once again.

Prepared for rejection again. 

There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, 

who do not walk according to the flesh,

but according to the Spirit.

Romans 8:1

Those seconds had to feel like days. 

When Jesus turned and said, 

"Be of good cheer, daughter; your faith has made you well."

No condemnation. Just love.

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Hebrews 11:1

Her Hope which she was clinging to became faith.

Faith became evidence of her Hope and made her well.

Notice Jesus didn't say "Your disorder is healed."

Or

"You are no longer in pain."

He said "made you well."

That means no more shame, rejection, condemnation,

fear, pain OR sickness.

She was made well. 

Complete restoration. 

wow.

Jesus changed the law. 

Jesus IS the law.

NO MORE SHAME.